Sometimes the Way Back is So Much Easier

Every once in a while I go rollerblading. It's a lot of fun, a good workout, a chance to enjoy the fresh air and I really like it. But occasionally it's not so fun. Like the time I went skating during flying ant mating season. Holy Ick Batman! Flying ants everywhere! Now, I know that they are just bugs and relatively harmless bugs at that, but for some reason they really ick me out. They just look gross! Of course, swarms of any kind of bug, even cute ones like lady bugs or those cute little tiny gold beetles would probably be gross too, but for some reason, flying ants are particularly uggy.

So, I got out of the car and saw a bunch of them flying around. Not so bad. Just a few bugs, right? So I put on my skates and headed out. Ick, a few bugs on my shirt - just shake them off. Make sure I breath through my nose, not my mouth. Don't want to breath the little buggers in. Alright, a few more on my shirt. And a few in my hair and on my helmet. I can take it. After a couple of miles I'd had enough. I couldn't take it! They were all over the place. So, I turned around and headed back. Return trip same as the way out - bugs in my hair, on my shirt, on my pants. I finally got back to the car and they were all over the car! Eeeewwww. So I opened the door and threw myself inside, slamming it behind me. Thank goodness only a few followed me in. Oh, it was so so so so gross. They were all over the windshield and the mirror. It was like Hitchcock's The Birds, but different.

Then there was the time I tried to skate in the wind. Now, I've skated in the wind before. It's a lot more work if you're fighting the wind, but it can be done, usually. This time was downright ridiculous. I swear it must have been blowing at 40 miles per hour. I didn't realize how windy it was or I wouldn't have tried. I got my skates on and headed out. And then realized Wow! It's windy. But I gave it a try. I fought and fought the wind. My thighs and calves and feet and butt were screaming after just a few yards. I kept trying, but if I slowed down at all, I would come to a complete halt and at one point even rolled backwards. OK! That's it. I gave up. After only 1/2 mile or so. It was pretty funny actually, I had to keep pulling over to the side (which I never do) to rest and try to wait out the gusts. But it was no use.

However, the way back was a piece of cake. All I had to do was stand there and let it push me back. I rolled pretty darn fast. As I was almost back I saw an older guy struggling with the wind. I just shook my head, then told him the way back was much easier. As I was finishing removing my skates about 5 minutes later I saw him heading to his car too.

Quack!