Feed Me Or I'll Eat Your Face (Adventures in Catversation)

  For some reason the cat will often have conversations with me. It's very cute! Well, recently we had a conversation like this:

Cat: Meow
Me: What are you doing kitty?
Cat: Meeurgh
Me: You're so cute. Are you talking to me?
Cat: Merrrow
Me: Come over here and sit with me.
Cat: Mrrrr
Me: Come on sweetie. Sit with Mommy.
Cat: Meeeeooww
Me: Do you want to play?
Cat: Mrrow
Me: Peek-a-boo!

She then pounced, jumping to the back of the couch where I was sitting, looked at me, then left.

And I thought that was all there was to it. Silly me. This is what was actually going on:

Cat: I'm hungry.
Me: What are you doing kitty?
Cat: Starving. Can you fill my bowl?
Me: You're so cute. Are you talking to me?
Cat: Yes I'm talking to you woman! I need some food here!
Me: Come over here and sit with me.
Cat: Sit with you? I don't have time for that! I'm wasting away here. Let's go!
Me: Come on sweetie. Sit with Mommy.
Cat: Shut up already with the sitting! Get me some chow!!
Me: Do you want to play?
Cat: No! I don't want to play. I want to eat! Eat!
Me: Peek-a-boo!
Cat: Idiot! [pounces] I should eat your face! [turns and leaves] I'm out of here dumb ass!

We discovered the truth of the conversation as soon the hubby glanced down the stairs to see her empty bowl glaring at him accusingly, light glinting off the cold, licked-clean metal and piercing his eye.

I apologized to her and filled her bowl. I'll have to make sure I listen the next time. She's smarter that I give her credit for.

(I'm very glad I can't hear what those meows actually mean. I suspect they are very close to what my imagination tells me.)

Quack!