Fairly Mellilow

  So I'm taking a training class for work and the break room is right across the hall from the classroom. Are you with me so far?

Now, said break room has the usual coffee and unhealthy snacks. It also has a CD player and a stack of CDs. Each day it plays some innocuously mellow music. Some days that music is better than others. The other day was Etta James - that was nice. More recently it was some way-too-mellow jazzy stuff that insinuated its way into my brain crenelations like worms in rotting meat. It was very difficult to pull it out and boy did that feel gross!

But I discovered there is a step beyond way-too-mellow jazzy stuff burrowing into my brain crevasses. Behold the horror of the day prior:

It didn't start out too badly. Even I can stand very small doses of fairly mellow Barry Manilow (or Mary Banilow as I prefer to call him). But after listening to a rousing rendition of Oh Mandy, followed by the upbeat and uber-lovely - I Write the Songs and the soothing and romantic - Looks Like We Made it, it started in on Copacabana. At that point it was far far far into the 'way-too-much-mary-banilow' category. And when I found my leg starting to bounce and my body starting to sway in time to the music I decided it was just over the top too  much! It was bad enough I was being subjected to endless Barry Manilow, but another thing altogether to have my body betray me and start moving in time with the music! Traitorous!

So, I went over to the break room . . .

and . . .

I . . .



turned that CD down!


Oh, I'm sorry. Were you expecting something more. Something involving shattered CD players and CDs spinning across the break room? Some cursing of the Mary Banilow name? Sorry to disappoint you. All I did was turn it town. Not off, just down. But boy did I turn that thing down! Way down! Now-no-one-can-hear-it down. Ha ha ha ha!

And before this class is over I'm bringing in some Five Finger Death Punch or maybe All That Remains. And I'll put that in the CD player. And I'll turn it up. Way up. Muah ha ha ha ha ha.

Quack!

Sweet Ineptitude

  The other day at work I got myself some coffee. I like a little sugar in my coffee so I reached for the sugar. It was one of those cylindrical cardboard cans with the plastic top. This happened to be a new one, so after lifting the flap, the little plastic tabbie thing on the top needed to be popped in. Piece of cake right?

Well, I don't know if I was just being stupid and did it wrong, or if the thing was defective, or if my muscular thumbs just got out of hand, but I ended up smashing the top into a pile of white plastic shards which of course ended up in the sugar. In fact, just about all of the cover was gone, leaving only a few ragged plastic edges, which of course I cut myself on. Not badly - just a small scratch, but for heaven's sake!

So, I picked the plastic bits off the top as best I could, poured some sugar into my coffee and left the room, flexing my powerful thumbs. Thank goodness there were no witnesses.

Quack!

Fifty Pounds of Snacks

  I bring my lunch to work everyday. It's healthier and cheaper than buying a lunch. And besides, I tend to be boring and predictable and don't mind eating the same thing day after day. So, every day I bring my sandwich and some yogurt and some milk to work.

And because I don't like that weird powdered non-dairy creamer stuff that's made of chemicals and strange toxic substances that's provided I bring some half and half for my coffee.

And because I'm usually in a hurry to get out of the house in the morning, I bring my breakfast. That usually involves a covered bowl of cereal, or oatmeal and some milk.

And because I try to eat healthy, I bring some fruit - usually two things. Today it was three - a banana, a container of cut-up watermelon and a container with orange wedges.

Yes, I bring all of that food with me to work. Every day.

I'm weird like that.

That's a lot of food. And it's heavy. I pack it all into a 9 foot duffle bag and sling it onto my back along with my laptop bag and my bag with my shoes and iPod and sketchbook and my purse. I leave every day with approximately 70 pounds of gear, 50 of which is food and snacks. I need all that food to maintain the muscle mass I get from carting around all that food.

Sometime I'll tell you about the drawer at work where I keep my supply of breakfast and lunch condiments.


Quack!

Cursing and Swearing and Having a Grand Ol' Time!

  So, I'm designing a web site. It's been a little over a year since I did one. I used to do that at my previous job - design web applications for the company using Lotus Notes and then later using Java on a JBoss server. I absolutely loved it! Granted I was developing corporate web applications, and not complete web sites, but much of it was the same - finding graphics, picking colors, designing layouts, setting up security, fighting over css issues due to browser differences, front-end coding and back-end coding, cursing and swearing and having a grand ol' time!

I started out my college career as a graphics arts major and sometimes I wish I never switched to business. I love the creativity involved with designing for the web - the messing with the layouts, the colors, the links and the relatively simple, but sometimes utterly frustrating code involved. It feels great to be doing this again after a year off. I've been working on it in my spare time (of which I have very little) over the last month. I've managed to get my PC set up with Java, Eclipse, Apache, PHP, Tomcat, Gimp and Filezilla (and get them all working). I've managed to remember most of what I used to know, learned the basics of PHP and learned a LOT more about Gimp (an awesome free graphics program for those who aren't willing to shell out mega bucks for Photoshop). Once this project wraps up I may have to create myself a website. If for no other reason than I really like messing with this stuff.

By the time this post is posted it should be live. Check it out and let me know what you think: Five Star Martial Arts.

Quack!

Pumpernickle Pickle

Last week I had to travel for work. I absolutely hate travelling for work. Away from family and all the comforts of home. Hate it. But that aside, most people who travel for work eat out a lot. You're not home, restaurants are the obvious choice. But me? What do I do? I usually stay somewhere where there is a sink and a refrigerator and a stove and a microwave. And I stop at the grocery store and get a few things. Nothing fancy, usually an odd assortment of stuff.

I love breakfast food so I'll have a large breakfast provided by the hotel - eggs, bacon, french toast, waffles, omelets, sausage, hash browns, you name it. Yum! All sorts of tasty choices.

Then a quick sandwich for lunch and for dinner it's cereal, or peanut butter toast, hot cocoa, yogurt. My last night I had to finish up my leftovers - I had pumpernickle bread with melted swiss cheese on top, a bowl of cereal and some peanut butter - off a spoon. Weird huh?! Yep! But tasty-licious!!

Quack!